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[Megamind] Megaopoly

Title: Meganopoly
Fandom: Megamind
Characters: Megamind, Roxanne, Minion
Word Count: 675
Rating: G
Summary: Roxanne is captured by that dastardly villain, Megamind. She's used to it.
Disclaimer: This is a non-profit, amateur effort not intended to infringe on the rights of Dreamworks or any other copyright holder.
Author's Notes: Written pre-release. Keep this in mind before pointing out any errors.

“So, Miss Ritchi, we meet again.”

Roxanne took a deep breath, glad to have the hood off. It always had that odd odour of dust and old coffee – she figured he must have spilled a cup on it, at one point. With fresh air in her lungs, she gathered enough sense of mind to refrain from rolling her eyes at the standard dramatics.

“Once Mr. Goody two-shoes has been informed of your predicament, he shall be lured to the bait like a fish, not realizing the hook concealed --”

She stopped him mid-rant. “Save your breath. He's out of town.”

“Wait, what?”

“Earthquake in Tibet. He's busy with recovery efforts. Pulling rubble off people, carrying in clean water, that sort of thing. Don't you watch the news?”

“I would if you spent less time prattling on about how wonderful Mr. Perfect Hair is. So, um, should we reschedule?” he said, pulling out a black leather planner.

Roxanne shrugged around her bonds. “It's all right. Having the lead reporter get kidnapped is always a ratings boost, so I'm earning double overtime for this.”

He slammed the planner shut with a manic grin. “So our game of wits shall continue! Minion, raise the board!”

Minion pulled a lever, causing a platform to smoothly rise from the floor in front of Roxanne. Another switch released her hands, though she was still tied to the chair.

Rubbing her wrists to restore circulation, Roxanne raised an eyebrow at the chessboard in front of her. There were scorch marks on it, and the pieces had been melted into place. “You forgot you fried it last time after I caught you moving pieces between kidnappings. And I still won.”

Megamind rubbed the back of his neck, awkwardly. “Er. Right. Minion, bring out the other set!”

“Yes, sir!” said Minion, who immediately ran off. Returning shortly, he carried over a long box. “I thought we could try something different, this time . . .”

“Monopoly? Are we out of chess sets?”

“Well, that too, but I wanted to play with you guys for a change.”

Roxanne smiled. “I'm fine with that. And it'll give Metro Man a few hours to stabilize things over there and find out what's going on.”

Sighing, Megamind tossed the ruined chess set to the side and gestured to Minion to set up the game board. “All right. But I get to be the car.”

“Dibs on the dog!” Minion grinned.

“I'll be the hat.” Roxanne said with a smile. “Pass the dice.”


“Park place . . . with a hotel. Pay up, smurf boy. I'm willing to take payment in real estate.”

Frowning, Megamind sorted through his remaining property cards. He had no desire to lose any of the properties he'd managed to build on. “Hmm . . . I'll give you both utilities.”

Roxanne considered this a moment, then reached out for the cards. “Deal. Minion, your roll.”

The fish-creature grinned and picked up the dice. “Come on, sixes!” he cried, shaking them frantically.

But before he could toss them, a klaxon blared. Moving to the console, Minion checked the radar. “Metro Man is returning to the city! Miss Ritchi, if you don't mind . . .”

Roxanne nodded, set the cards down, and put her hands in position behind the chair again. The manacles clamped back on. “Until next time.”

Megamind rolled his chair over to the switch, causing the platform and game board to retract almost seamlessly below the floor. Clearing his throat, he tried a practice laugh. “Bwahahaha . . . no, deeper. MuahahahaHA! Ah, that's it. Minion, ready the camera!”

Roxanne hid a smile and did her best to look like she'd spent a less than enjoyable time there. Sometimes she wondered just how evil Megamind was. But then, nice people don't tend to resort to kidnapping to get someone to play Monopoly with them.


( 11 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 3rd, 2010 09:56 pm (UTC)
You wrote it. You wrote it, and then you cranked it up a notch.

YOU ARE BRILLIANT. This was great! ♥
Nov. 3rd, 2010 10:03 pm (UTC)
*bows* You gotta find some way to pass the time once your hostage gets used to the alligators and flamethrowers.
Nov. 3rd, 2010 10:16 pm (UTC)
And once you've melted the chessboard, why not Monopoly? XD
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:37 am (UTC)
This is adorable! Love it! :)
Nov. 4th, 2010 03:43 pm (UTC)

This is awesome.
Nov. 4th, 2010 07:07 pm (UTC)
From now on I am convinced that this is a missing scene from the film. :-)
In other words, it's wonderful story; I could hear the dialogue in the characters' voices throughout.
Nov. 5th, 2010 02:29 am (UTC)
Yep. It'd just stretch out the movie too long to show every time Roxanne was kidnapped. This is just maybe a few weeks back before the main events of the movie. *grin* Glad you liked!
Nov. 10th, 2010 02:07 am (UTC)
So cute! Good work!
Nov. 13th, 2010 07:18 am (UTC)
This was ADORABLE XD!!!! I can TOTALLY see Megamind doing something like this ^_^!
Nov. 18th, 2010 02:44 am (UTC)
This is just perfect. :D
Mar. 12th, 2011 03:59 am (UTC)

Ha. I love that Roxanne was winning. Not that I'd doubt it. She really is the smartest person he knows....
( 11 comments — Leave a comment )